family
I hate that the ones we love the most are the ones who see us at our ugliest.
Yesterday was a rough day. Nothing out of the ordinary, just little things going wrong and piling up on each other. Phil and I both didn't get much sleep the night before. We were out of every sort of caffeine. Addie and Ingrid both refused naps. There was much whining and crying throughout the day. My phone was lost under the deck. I paid for four donuts and only got three. I set out to fill up my growler with new iced coffee and came home with none because the girls weren't having it in the car. I sent Phil and Addie on a fun daddy-daughter date so I could get some work done but Ingrid wasn't on her best behavior so you know the rest of that story.
Out of frustration and exhaustion, I was mean and rude and hateful to the ones I love the most. To my sweethearts all three, I am sorry. I am sorry that you get to see your mama at her ugliest. I am sorry you see me when I am most frustrated or overwhelmed. I am sorry that the annoyances of life that don't even concern you creep into the corners of our time together. You are the ones who have to pay when my job is frustrating. You are the ones who pay when the donut lady can't do her job right. You are the ones I somehow get frustrated with after a lovely call from the cable guy or health insurance lady. Sorry for it all.
But rightly so, we need a place. We need a place to spray our frustrations around. We need a place to be mad or sad or angry and more often than not, that place is the comfort of our own homes where our loved ones live. It will forever be this way. The beauty of it all is that these people, our most beloved, also get to see us at our best. They get to see us when glory is in the air and love is overflowing. So that's good. Home is that place. The place for truth, for honesty, for real life - no matter how glorious or crummy it might be...
-L
Yesterday was a rough day. Nothing out of the ordinary, just little things going wrong and piling up on each other. Phil and I both didn't get much sleep the night before. We were out of every sort of caffeine. Addie and Ingrid both refused naps. There was much whining and crying throughout the day. My phone was lost under the deck. I paid for four donuts and only got three. I set out to fill up my growler with new iced coffee and came home with none because the girls weren't having it in the car. I sent Phil and Addie on a fun daddy-daughter date so I could get some work done but Ingrid wasn't on her best behavior so you know the rest of that story.
Out of frustration and exhaustion, I was mean and rude and hateful to the ones I love the most. To my sweethearts all three, I am sorry. I am sorry that you get to see your mama at her ugliest. I am sorry you see me when I am most frustrated or overwhelmed. I am sorry that the annoyances of life that don't even concern you creep into the corners of our time together. You are the ones who have to pay when my job is frustrating. You are the ones who pay when the donut lady can't do her job right. You are the ones I somehow get frustrated with after a lovely call from the cable guy or health insurance lady. Sorry for it all.
But rightly so, we need a place. We need a place to spray our frustrations around. We need a place to be mad or sad or angry and more often than not, that place is the comfort of our own homes where our loved ones live. It will forever be this way. The beauty of it all is that these people, our most beloved, also get to see us at our best. They get to see us when glory is in the air and love is overflowing. So that's good. Home is that place. The place for truth, for honesty, for real life - no matter how glorious or crummy it might be...
-L
4 comments:
I really love this!
So true. I always cringe at the thought of how I sometimes act toward the ones I love, but I like your pointing out that they also get us at our best, and I think that provides a lovely balance. <3
My mother used to always say that was the privilege of being family. That you get to see the intimate stuff--and that means the good AND the bad.
Oh, how I have had days like this!
Keep doing what you do here, Lacy. You have so much talent.
Love, Caroline
Well written. And oh I do understand.
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